2016 Hopes and Desires

I won't use resolutions or goals - those words have never worked for me in the past!

Eat cleaner
Don't buy lunch at work
Walk more steps and track them
Weigh myself every day
Drink  more water
Go out to eat less often
Do more physical activity besides running
Be more present for my kids
Be wiser with my $
Cook/prepare a bigger variety of foods

Goals are supposed to me measurable and I don't want to measure - Yes I want to weigh myself more often and keep track of my steps, but I am not saying I will run X# of miles or lose X# of pounds.

I do want to try tracking my food (I need to re-calculate the new WW points for my favorite foods)

But I don't want the pressure of a # (I may re-consider the running # because that does help keep me motivated).

I want to go into our cruise in 106 days feeling good about myself - no, I won't be at a weight I want to be at, but as long as I am out of the 200s and have made an effort, that will be good. If I had to go tomorrow, one I wouldn't have a lot of clothes to wear and 2, I wouldn't want many pictures taken of me - sucks for a trip we are spending a ton of $ on.

2015 was a bad, bad year. I'm am hoping 2016 will be better!

2015 Recap

This is not a post I wanted to write, because, well, 2015 for the most part sucked. I shouldn't say that, January was really good. I ate well, I ran a ton, we thought my Dad would live another 18 months, and then February came and it all went to crap. The snow came, the running did not, my dad's health took a nose-dive and I spent every Sunday visiting him and saying good-bye each time, and until then none of my weight-gain had been attributed to grief (the 8 lbs I had gained were 4 lbs the 2 weeks after my 1/2 and 4 lbs at Disney, none of which came off).

The negatives (in addition to the obvious big one - my dad dying)

I gained a ton of weight (to the tune that the scale said 211 yesterday)

I didn't cook anything new or good

We ate out way too much (too much $ and too many calories)

Coming home at 2:30 starting in September was not good for my waistline

I ran a lot during the week, but not a lot on the weekends and those long runs were not good runs

I had to bag out of more races than I ran due to weather, my own illness, and kid's illness

Besides running, I didn't do anything else to move my body (no biking, strength training, swimming, etc)

I didn't spend enough time on my own hobbies

We spent more $ than we should have 

I didn't hit my goal of 500 miles

The positives

We traveled a lot

We were able to do a lot more with the kids 

I ran 38 more miles than last year (438)

Here is to a better 2016 - tomorrow I will write about my hopes for 2016 (I won't say resolutions!)

 

Here are pictures from the year - there aren't a ton of me, because weight gain = me hating to have my picture taken

 

 

Our typical New Year's Eve shennanigans

My typical way of starting out the New Year - the other 2 ladies both ran marathons in the spring - more power to them - something I have zero desire to do!

I ran a ton in January and then it started to snow and snow and snow

But New England had something to celebrate

I ran the BAA 5k in April - slower than the year before, which was my first sign that weight gain really does make you slower

Easter is a time of rebirth even though we knew a life would soon end

And it did - this is me, my mom, my brother, and my kids at my dad's burial in June

Because I didn't want to sit around and mourn my dad, we saw every New England state, plus New York. This was my favorite weekend - Maine.

I ate lobster

And I ran 

And I relaxed (this is actually New Hampshire)

My daughter ran her first 5k in September

We enjoyed the fall

I ran after thanksgiving

And we enjoyed Star Wars and Christmas

Indulgent Christmas Weekend

Saturday December 12 I did go to WW to learn about the new SmartPoints. I had lost almost 4 lbs that week!! I was so the normal leader wasn't there - the sub was the leader we had had at Work in the past and I am not a big fan.

All Saturday afternoon was spent at a friend's holiday party. I tried to eat okay, but it really wasn't easy. I had a couple of glasses of wine early in the afternoon, but then changed to water because I thought I would be running the next day.

Sunday I had hoped to do 7 miles on my own starting at 6:30 am - We had to leave the house by 9:00 and I needed to shower and get all dressed up, so I knew I was cutting it really close. I woke up at 5:30 and just kept waiting for it to get light enough. The weekend before I had run with my group at 6:30 and felt like it was doable to do on my own. But the 7 days seemed to make a difference and with it being cloudy there was just no light. I didn't feel comfortable doing it on my own, so I bagged it. I could have started later and gone less miles, but I had it in my mind what I wanted to do and I didn't want to change it - need to work on that!

We went to the Boston POPs Christmas concert - it was so much fun. We got food at the event and then went out for a late lunch after. None of it was healthy!

During the week there was a lot of baking done and dinners were pretty disorganized.

I had every intention of going to WW on Saturday, but we just had way too much to do, so Friday night I decided I would skip it. I hated doing it, but it made our Saturday run much more smoothly.

We finally told the kids about our cruise in April, then went to see Star Wars, and then went out to a Japense Hibachi place for dinner. Nothing healthy about it!

Sunday I was supposed to do a holiday 5K with my running group, but my daughter woke up at 4 am with a sick stomach so I was up for 2 hours and exhausted, so went back to sleep and skipped the race. That is my story of 2015 - I think I have had to skip more races/races cancelled (for a variety of reasons: weather, Dad's death, me being sick, kids being sick) than I actually ran :(

Sunday was more poor eating. I am really going to try to eat better the next 3 days so I can enjoy Christmas Eve and Christmas Day and then get back on track - no waiting until New Year's - though our New Year's Eve is not healthy!

Good choices on Thursday

Thursday I made some good choices and some not so great choices, but I was fairly conscious with my poorer choices.

Wednesday night me and the kids made Tollhouse cookies, the majority of them to be frozen for Santa. I only had a tiny, tiny bit of batter. Win in my book!

Thursday morning I ran almost 4 miles - even extending my run as the rest of the group was only running 3 that day.

Thursday I worked from home in the morning and we had a hectic afternoon. I ate my normal meals, even including lunch (where normally I would have made 2 boxes of Mac and Cheese with the kids and eaten 1/2 of it myself).

We had parent/teacher conferences, after which we came back before heading to the Mall.  Not knowing when we would eat, I did have some not-so-healthy snacks before leaving - 3 cookies and some Chex Mix (with the cashews removed).

I passed up free samples at the Lindt store (as well as the ton of Lindt my husband brought home!)

We went to the Cheesecake Factory for a very early dinner (like 4 o'clock early!) - I had water, passed on the bread because I don't love their bread, and had a appetizer version of a chopped salad (probably still had 1000 calories!) and summer rolls. And we all passed on dessert. I got into bed at 10 and realized I was starving - of course I was, I hadn't eaten in 6 hours! But I went to bed.

So some very conscious decisions made :)

Very bad, but getting better.....

I ended up going to Weight Watchers through October 17th, but then stopped until last weekend and when I returned on 12/5/2015 I had gained 9 lbs (in less than 2 months) so I was also in a new decade of weight, and not in a good way :(

I am not surprised that I gained so much weight, but very, very mad. The gain was due to eating lunch at work a lot, which included a 12 oz can of regular coke. But we were also eating out a lot. My father dying awarded us a little extra money and because we were so busy and stressed, it was easiest to go out a lot. And during these meals out I was having alcohol, which I hadn't really had much of in years. It tastes great but not good for the waistline or wallet.

In gaining 30 lbs since 9/20/2014 I have miraculously not gone up a size (I was just barely getting into a size 14 so very quickly last year they didn't fit, but it wasn't like I had gotten rid of my 16). But now I am to the point where the size 16 are starting to feel snug. And there is NO way I was going to buy new clothes. And we are going on this very nice, very expensive vacation in April and while I can't lose all the weight I've regained, I can do a lot in 4 months to make myself feel a lot better about myself.

I didn't realize Weight Watchers was changing their program when I returned but I am very excited. I've read some people's opinions on-line. I need the incentive to eat less sugar and less saturated fat. Less sugar = less belly fat which will help me tremendously.

I think I am going to step back from running just a little. I strongly believe in less sleep = weight gain. Getting up at 4:30 am Tues/Thurs was taking a toll on me. I don't want to stop running all together and I don't want to just run 1x a week, so I am going to try dropping my Tuesday am run and just run Thursday am (4 miles) and then a "long run" (6-8 miles) on Sundays.

I have had a hard time losing weight while doing a lot of exercising, so that is why I need to step back a little bit. But I also have to get better at moving during the day.

I have a folder on my hard drive which I have "Pictures of Me" going back to high school. I added tons of pictures when I was losing weight and I looked at it a lot because it also had my "before pictures". And I was looking at pictures from our Christmas card photo shoot (at home with the timer) and I came across a picture of me that was awful and went to add it to this folder and realized I hadn't added any pictures in a year. Part of it was that there aren't a ton of pictures of me in the last year because as I was re-gaining weight, I no longer wanted pictures taken of me. And the few pictures I do have, I didn't want to add to this folder.

But I went through the last year, added all the pictures of me regardless of how bad, and now I am moving forward towards wanting to have tons of pictures taken of me. While I need to lose weight for long term for me health, the immediate reason is to like the pictures of me come April because we are spending a ton of money and I want to have beautiful photographic memories.

Monday fail....Tuesday flying

I knew that Monday evenings are hard - not having dinner until 7 pm and being home with a 6 year old for 2 hours. I ate well all day, had my normal snack when me and the kids got home at 3:30. And then by 6 I wanted a small snack - I had some cheese, dried fruit and nuts.....and then more cheese...and more, then rice cakes with Nutella.....and then ate dinner.

So I told my husband that having a family dinner on Mondays just wasn't going to happen - the kids could eat before she goes to soccer and then my son will want a snack later on and she'll want a snack when she gets home, and I will probably do a Shake and then a small snack later. I know family dinners are important, but 7 nights a week are impossible.

First night of "new TV" and I already didn't get to bed at 9:30 as planned. I've been wanting to sort through pictures on the computer for months - usually I do it every few months, I haven't done it since Easter! So I spent several hours picking the good ones out and later I will go through and edit them. So I didn't get upstairs until after 9 and wanted to unwind, so I watched a DVRed show and didn't go to bed until almost 10.

But I did get up at 4:30 and ran. There were a ton of us running today, but not the faster people. After suffering all summer with the humidity, I wanted to test my legs, so I ran ahead on my own. 4 miles with an average page of 11:18. My music stopped pretty quickly and I didn't want to fumble with it, so I ran music-less.

I want to hit 400 miles during the Tufts 10K, and I need 41.5 miles, which is pretty aggressive. I have charted a plan of attack, which includes a 10 mile run (I want to see the work they have done to expand the rail trail, so the only way I can do that is to run the 5 miles to the end....and 5 miles back :) ). I haven't run more than 7 miles since mid-May when I ran 13.1 (and then didn't run the actual 1/2 Marathon race).

Weekly Weigh-in #2

Starting Weight: 232.2
Current Weight: 200.4
Change from last week: -0.6
Total weight change: -31.8

The weight I put here is my own weight at home. Last week I was surprised that the difference between my home weight and the Weight Watcher's scale was only 1.0 pounds because at my normal center I was used to a 1.4 or 1.6 lb difference. But this week I weighed in at a different scale and they had me staying the same (ie a 1.6 lb difference).

I was 100% okay with staying the same in their eyes after such a difficult week.

Between soccer games we went to McDonald's and I made pretty good choices: grilled chicken wrap (instead of crispy - difference of 240 calories!) or a Big Mac. I ordered with no fries but my husband wanted extra fries so I did get the meal - I did steal a couple. I had water instead of soda.

We went out to our favorite indulgent meal:
Bread and butter
French  onion soup
Salad
Steak au Poivre
Skillet cookie with ice cream
Lots of wine

I didn't make a healthy choice there, but I am okay with it. I had "pre-planned" my meal and I owned the choices. We go there once a year, so I want to live!

And....AFTER my meeting I ran 6.7 miles because I knew I wouldn't want to run on Sunday. I didn't start until 9 am and it was warm and humid and I was miserable, but I did it!

Mid-week check in

Despite the eating not going great this week, this week is going well!

Having the client in this week has proven very challenging from an eating aspect, but they will be gone after tonight so I can get back on track and the full week is not lost.

I do acknowledge that I have a very hard time making healthy choices when faced with un-healthy options, but the client visit is only 2 times a year so I chalk it up to a "special occasion" with a finite end date/time. Tonight we are going to a cooking class as a team-building activity....and I will enjoy my wine as well!

Tuesday morning I ran 4 miles - a normal Tuesday morning. But the best run in a long time! Cool, dry temps, losing the camel-bak, having eaten well the day before, running with different people, listening to music, and running on fresh legs could all have been contributors to the great run. My body does not like humidity, not matter what my weight. So I am hoping the drier weather is indicative of feeling better about running.

Weekly Weigh-in #1

Since I feel like I am starting over, I will start again at Week 1, sort of....

Starting Weight: 232.2
Current Weight: 201.0
Change from last week: N/A
Total weight change: -31.2

Saturday I went to a new Weight Watchers meeting at a new location. I had met the leader before as she had subbed at my old location. She was funny. Since it was the first weekend after Labor Day and they were rolling out the new "success story" booklets, it was the perfect week for me to start.

Saturday was never supposed to be a good day eating wise:
I had a normal breakfast.
Then my daughter had a soccer game at noon. As we were getting gas after we saw my husband and son pulling into McDonald's so we followed them - I got a wrap, water and only had a couple of fries so so-so decisions there.
Then we had to go to a 'beginning of season' soccer party - I skipped the chips at the table and drank water, but not knowing when and if I would get dinner, I had 2 pieces of pizza even though it was only 3:30 and grabbed a full Coke for later because I needed to stay awake.
Then she and I went to see One Direction - I had a protein bar and my can of Coke as "tail gating" and then had total junk (but not a ton of it and lots of water) at the concert.

But Sunday I was back on track - I ate well all day except I had 2 Pillsbury Biscuits with dinner. Not bad for a day full of cramps :(

I weighed myself this morning and am mentally preparing myself for a challenging week full of client visits/meetings. Is it Friday yet???

I am back!

Tomorrow morning I go back to Weight Watchers - I went back for 2-3 weeks in June, but haven't been back since (and really hadn't been consistently since January) I am trying out a different location (and a different leader) - hopefully it will work out better. I am making Weight Watchers a priority again - no more running instead of WW on Saturday mornings. Plus we have been away 7 weekends since mid-June, so it was hard to get momentum and was not good on the waistline!

This morning my weight was 202.8 :( Immediate goal is to get back until 200. Would like to be 184 by the time we go on a cruise in April.

I have gained 20+ pounds since last September 20th - some of them have been big jumps, some gradual.

I was going through my pictures trying to find ones to post here and realize how few pictures there are of me in the last year - that is what happens when you start to gain weight!

Last September at the Diva Dash - I was 181 and feeling on top of the world.

Mid-April at the BAA 5K (2 days before the Boston Marathon) - I didn't PR the course (I had a PR the previous year) - the weight gain and the hard Boston winter were to blame

Easter 2015

What I don't have pictures from here is the 1/2 marathon that I was supposed to do over Memorial Day weekend - I trained for it and ran 13.1 miles 2 weeks prior, the weekend after my dad died. But I chose not the run the 1/2 on race day - I did the 5 miles instead. I am glad I did because it was hot! And I did PR the 5 miles with 55 minutes.

Mid-June at my dad's memorial service - I was so miserable that I couldn't wear any of the cute size 14 clothes from our honeymoon I had been able to wear the summer before

An all-women's 5K in mid-July - again, didn't PR the course and the year before had been 95 and 100% humidity

After Beach to Beach 10K - with Joan Benoit Samuelson. See me hide. I was happy with my results because it was the first hilly race and it was very hot - my time wasn't far off my 10K PR

Same weekend as previous picture - see me hide in the picture

My 45th birthday celebration at the Melting Pot

So here I am. A "new year". My schedule is quite different this school year - after 2+ years of planning I am now leaving in the afternoon to get the kids off the bus and working from home. Today is only the 7th day of school. Of the 7 days, 3-4 of them I have had way too much to eat for snack - almost mini-binges, so a rule needs to be 1) don't eat before the kids get home and 2) don't have more snack than I would at work.

I had signed up for a 1/2 on November 8th way back in January - but I have decided not to do it - I feel like that is the story of my life this year. I need to concentrate on weight loss, and I don't lose, I gain during 1/2 training. I will cut back my running even more or stop all together (temporarily) in order to re-lose the 20 lbs. Right now I am signed up for a 5K at the end of September, 2 10Ks in October, a Turkey Trot (November) and a Jingle Bell run (December) and will do the 5K or 10K on New Year's Day. I have been trying to run 15 miles a week - 2 4-milers during the week and 7 miles on the weekend. I had my highest monthly miles in August with 53. I've been doing my 2 weekly runs with my running group at 5 am and then the long run on the weekends on my own.

Things I need to do to lose weight:
--Drink more water
--Move more at work
--Get more sleep
--Cross train 1x a week and strength train
--No buying lunch at work
--No eating until the kids come home and then only my normal snack
--No snacking while making dinner
--Much less eating out
--Get back to meal planning
--Much smaller portions at dinner

If I can do the above, I will be a much better place!

So what has lit a spark this time? Hovering around 200 all summer, knowing my running has suffered, seeing my belly in pictures and knowing that is where a lot of the weight has gone, not wanting pictures taken of me, having to buy a new pair of jeans not because it was too small, but because it was almost worn out in the thigh area, knowing I want to feel good about myself on our cruise in 7 months - it was too hard to get motivated with all these trips this summer (which were for the most part fun, but exhausting and a lot of eating out). But we have no trips planned until April! I do have a lot to do this fall with 2 kids in soccer, and finally starting to pack up more of the stuff at my parent's house (my mom wants to downsize) after taking the summer off.

I can do this!!!!

Grieving and moving forward....

My father passed away in his sleep on Monday May 4th. He had been in the hospital for 2 weeks and hospice was brought in on April 29th. We are all thankful that he is finally at peace, because it was a long, long year for him and my mother.

I tried so hard last year for his illness to not interrupt my exercise and weight-loss efforts and that worked until February when he really started going down hill. I am now 15 lbs above where I was in September.

I went to the doctor yesterday for a physical. She had been at 200 --it was at 2:00 in the afternoon. And that was after she took off 2 lbs for clothing. The doctor was nice --she said it is okay to be overweight was long as you are very active. So she really urged me to lose the 15 lbs I need to go get back to "overweight".  So I that is my goal to work on for the next 3-4 months. To actively work on losing weight again. And then I'll take it from there.

I ran 13.1 miles on Saturday, not for a race. I wanted to prove to myself that I physically could do it, and then I decided to drop down from the 1/2 on Memorial Day weekend to the 5 mile option. The last 3 miles were miserable. I don't want to be miserable. I wasn't going to race at all, but I miss doing it, so this is a good option. It will be hard because the course goes by the hospital where my dad died, but I can be strong about that.

So I am not feeling great about myself, but I am excited for the plan ahead.

Checking in....

I exist, but it isn't an existence I want right now.

My father is going to pass away any day now and it has just been a sucky, sucky year. And while he will be at peace, which is important, those still living are left with all the grief while trying to keep on living. There is going to be so much to do over the next year or two as my mom makes decisions about where she wants to live, all while trying to grieve over the loss of her husband (they would have celebrated 55 years this June).

Work is crazy. We have a project due tomorrow, which is helping me to stay busy.

And with this craziness I have made a decision. I will not be racing my 1/2 Marathon over Memorial Day weekend.

I have built up to 10 miles. I had done 8 miles a couple of weekend, 9 miles on Easter and 10 miles the weekend after that. Last weekend I did the BAA 5k and then 6.4 flat miles the next day.

This weekend I was supposed to race a 10 mile innaugural race by the beach. But the race didn't start until 9 so I wouldn't have been done until 11 and then after recovering and an hour drive back home, it would have been so late and I had a lot of things i wanted to do. So when my running partner, whom I hadn't seen since New Year's Day until last weekend, needed 9 taper miles, I chose to join her. It was the longest I'd ever run with anyone else. She and I had run almost 8 miles in December, but usually our long training runs have been on our own (I give her credit for doing so much of her marathon training on a treadmill this past awful winter).

I was scheduled to do 11 miles this coming weekend and 12 the following weekend. But I just don't want to do those runs. I want to enjoy my family and not be in pain. So I think I will now back down my miles to the 6-7 miles I want to be my normal non-training weekend runs.

Another reason I am stepping away from the 1/2 Marathon is I need to get the scale moving in the right direction again. For the majority of this month, the scale has said 197. That is way, way to close to 200. And I gained weight the couple weeks before my 1/2 in October. I can't afford to gain. I don't want to wait another 5 weeks (last time my appetite was huge was 1-2 weeks after the race) to start losing weight again.

I am a little sad about not doing the race. But I am actually really excited to get back to runs I enjoy, and find new routes (the 9 miles I did today was NOT on the bike path! It was on real roads with real hills!).

I will return to Weight Watchers someday.....

The struggles continue. I know, I know, I know I need to buckle down and get back under 190. This past weekend I was 192.8 but went out to dinner both Saturday and Sunday and feeling huge right now.

Weekend runs haven't happened 2 weekends in a row. A week ago was my son's birthday and the weather wasn't great and I wanted to just sleep in....so I did.

I did get out for 4 miles last Tuesday.

This past weekend I planned on 7 miles but wasn't in a rush because we didn't have plans until 2:30, so I didn't hit the road until 9:30. It was freezing and very windy and I really, really didn't want to be out there. I had eaten poorly the night before and that is never a good recipe for a good long run. Literally 2 minutes into my run, during which I considered quitting the 1/2 and wondering if I should just quit running, my mom called with potentially bad news about my dad. I quit my run right then and there. Thankfully it was a false alarm and I could have gone back out and completed (well, started again) my run, but mentally I was done.

But I did get in another 4 miles this morning. 5 am. 13 degrees, wind chill of 6. Hello Spring....

Friday the 13th.....

I am just counting down the minutes until I can get out of here and another busy weekend begins.

2+ weeks of not posting is never a good thing. Not at all.

I skipped WW last Saturday and skipping again tomorrow as well. There are days when I feel like throwing in the towel - not quitting the journey, but quitting WW. I am hoping when/if my company renews their contract with WW in April that we will be able to do the Personal Coaching. I think that would really help.

The motivation of eating healthy just hasn't been there and that is reflected on the scale and how I feel. TOM is coming soon and I hope to rebound after that.

Right now i am stressed about my son's birthday (I loathe having birthday parties), my dad's illness, work, and the still lingering depression of this awful winter.

But in good news....

--Spring will officially be here next week! Wednesday it was almost 60! Granted it is going to pour tomorrow and snow on Sunday and be in the 30s next week......

--I've been running outside! March 1st I ran 4 miles, including hills, with the running group. 2 days later I got up at 4:30 am to run more hills. Last Sunday I found out they had been plowing a bike trail (not the normal one I run on) so I did 7 miles and this week I got up at 4:30 to run 3.5 miles with the group.

Tomorrow I am pulling out my spring clothes - I am pretty sure I didn't get rid of a lot of the bigger stuff because I know I will need it. But hopefully it will also be the incentive I need to get back into the 14s.

Weekly Weigh in

I made it to my meeting!! It had been 3 weeks and weeks since I allowed the receptionist to tell me I lost. When I know I've gained I tell the receptionist not to say anything.

Weight: 190.2

So close to being back in the 180s!

I ate well at work all week! I went to the grocery store last night and didn't get crap.

The bad news is that I am not racing tomorrow. My dad isn't doing well and with the race being at 11:00 (in the opposite direction of the hospital) it would make for a hard day. So I chose to skip the race (which means I am skipping the whole series) but am going to run with my running group - with some people I haven't run with before. I hope to find people I can run on Sundays with.

We have plans tonight which includes going out to dinner and I am going to try not to get out of control.

So far so good.....

I wish all weeks could be like this (okay, without the bad weather).

It is almost noon on Thursday and so far things are going well.

1) Wear my fitness monitors and try to get in more steps - Wearing them, not getting as many steps as I would like
2) Drink my water - Pretty good
3) No soda or hot chocolate --GOOD
4) No buying my lunch - GOOD
5) No snacking when I get home or desserts - GOOD

I am having lunch with a co-worker and I am NOT going to buy my lunch. I will pop my trusty Lean Cuisine pizza in the microwave and go meet her in the cafeteria.

The movement hasn't been very great. I continue to be busy at work, but not stressed,  so I have been sitting more than I would like. But I have been also getting up and doing some laps around the floor. But the highest I've reached this week was 7,500 which isn't great.

On the downside, I know why I've been able to be successful this week
1) No work stress
2) Not as much Dad stress
3) Simple, boring dinners
4) Ability to go to bed early

When the routine is there and not very exciting, I do well. But I can very easily get thrown off which is what I need to work on. Life is not easy and in order for me to be successful, I need to be able to keep myself in check through the good and the bad.

This weekend we are going to a college hockey game and will go out to dinner before. I will check out the menu and pick something reasonable. No beer. And I don't need snacks at the game.

Sunday I actually have a race! It is the 4 mile of my 3(which got postponed last weekend)-4-5 race. I haven't done any running this week. But I didn't do any during the week last year anyways, so I will just go and have fun.

Trying to get back into it.....

It is definitely hard around these parts. They were threatening more snow last week and this weekend - The end of last week didn't amount to much. My husband did have to snow blow on Sunday but it was only 2-3". Thankfully it didn't rain the 1" we were expecting because that would have wreaked havoc on everyone's roofs.

Last week was school break and my eating was completely out of hand. Thursday I had a huge deliverable and I was taking some time off in the afternoon to get the kids out of the house, so I snacked like crazy - to the tune of a box of Buffalo Wheat Thins and a bag of chocolate covered cranberries. After going to the bouncy place, my husband met us and we went to a Japanese Steakhouse, lots of fancy drinks and all. Friday I took the kids to the movies in the afternoon.

But school is back in session (though my husband did just have to go pick my daughter up because she complained of a stomach ache. Great.....) but I have told myself I need to get back on track.

1) Wear my fitness monitors and try to get in more steps
2) Drink my water
3) No soda or hot chocolate
4) No buying my lunch
5) No snacking when I get home or desserts

I am going to try to do that this work week and see how it goes. I HAVE to get back into the 180s (Scale this morning said 193 :(  )

I am here....barely.....

If you've had your head in the sand and not listened to the news, then you know it's been a rough month to live in the Boston area.

Up until January 23rd we really hadn't had much snow (except maybe if you consider the white Thanksgiving we had!). I had been running outside and was excited to continue doing so all winter long. We had some snow that day but the next morning I ran 7 miles outside in slush and ice and I tried my yacktracks. But then came Monday the 26th and the first of FOUR storms where we've gotten more than a foot - one of which was 2 1/2 feet! One or two which were blizzards (I can't remember if this past storm eventually was categorized as a blizzard). My kids had 4 snow days in less than 2 weeks and a 5th last week. They are on vacation now, a vacation they don't need - they are at each other's throats and driving us crazy.

I did manage to get 1 run in outside about 10 days ago - it was only 3 miles. But other than that it is just too dangerous because the roads are to narrow and even if you do run in the road, you can't jump off the road because the snowbanks are so high. I was signed up for 2 races this weekend - a 3 miler and a 7 mile leg of a marathon relay, both of which were cancelled because the roads are too bad. The relay was outright cancelled. The 3 miler is postponed to mid-April. Who knows if the 4 and 5 miler will get in. There isn't any melting going on so the roads aren't getting any better.

And let's not even talk about how all of this has affected my eating. Out.Of.Control. I sware everyone in Boston has gained 10 pounds in the last month. Stress, aggrivation, depression, boredom, annoyance, everything.

I dream of getting back outside running. I just hate the treadmill. I don't feel like my stride is right. I am afraid of getting hurt. Outside is where I love to be. But I need to start getting miles in. 1/2 training will officially start in a month, but I need to be running 6-7 mile long runs on the weekend.

On a good note, we booked a cruise for April of 2016 so something wonderful to look forward to!

Slow start to the year.....

So much for posting more frequently in 2015. I put my lap top next to my bed so I would be more tempted to post when I crawled into bed to escape the coldness of the winter. But I've been reading quite a few books this year, so the laptop has been ignored.

Another downfall to ignoring the laptop is I haven't been logging my (almost) daily weigh-ins. I've been stepping on the scale for the most part (and mainly horrified with what I saw - more on that later) so didn't feel the need to record it. My laptop takes a while to get logged on, so I would do it while the kids were eating breakfast. So back downstairs the laptop will go.

Yes, the eating has been pretty horrible so far in 2015. I continue to be very busy at work, which has resulted in numerous all day meetings - in which breakfast and/or lunch are brought in, or we get a break for lunch and I am so mentally drained that I want to buy lunch instead of eating what I brought. Last week I bought my lunch FOUR times, and that included a regular 12 oz Coke each day! AND I was going home and snacking heavily while making dinner.

Needless to say, the scale was awful last Saturday - like into the 190s awful. But I went to Weight Watchers AND I got on the scale. I am continuing my promise to go to WW as many weeks as I can this year and step on the scale every time. Running on Saturday is no longer an excuse not to go to WW.

I have told myself that I want to run at least 2x a week and run at least 10 miles a week.

Jan 1 I did my 10K, so I ran 3.8 miles on the treadmill that Sunday. I got the Gilmore Girls series for Christmas, so 1 episode is 43 minutes. So it will be nice to see how the distance I run in 43 minutes may change, though I am pretty much a treadmill wimp. I can't run as fast on it as I can outside.

Last week I planned on getting up and running and just couldn't bring myself to get out of bed, even though everything was laid out. Finally for Friday morning the running group was doing 4 miles, so I jumped in. Sunday I knew I had to do 6 miles and the bike path is now iced over, so I had to do it in our neighborhood. Most of the streets around me are narrow and windy, so I have to do some backtracking - I fit in 6 miles, but I will need 7 miles as well so adding in an extra mile will be serious backtracking. Mental toughness!

This week was more of the same - bed was just too inviting. I did get up at 4:40 am Thursday but there was a coating of snow and ice outside, so I bailed on the group. And I went back to bed....for 2 hours.

I forced myself to get up this morning because I wanted to stick to my 10 miles. I did 3.8 on the treadmill. So I will do a 10K distance, at least on Sunday. It is supposed to rain, but I will be out there!

Eating has been a little bit better this week, not perfect. I did bring my lunch downstairs to eat with a friend, and I ate sensibly when she and I went out yesterday. I didn't weigh myself this morning, so not sure what the scale will be like tomorrow morning.

A New Year

Bye-bye 2014. Not sad to see you go!

We had fun celebrating on New Year's Eve, but I didn't stay up until midnight. I was tired and I had 6.22 miles to race the next morning.

 

I have done this race before, last year and 3 years ago. But I hadn't done the 10K before. A year ago I decided that I should do the 10K. I knew it would be mentally tough because it is 2 loops of the 5K. And half of the race is a long a river. On January 1st = cold and windy!

I got there very early because last year there was a ton of traffic and parking isn't right close to the venue. I had drunk a ton of water before I left because I had a lot of salty food on NYE, so the chilly port-a-potties were needed. 

After getting my bib, I walked back to my car to get my FlipBelt and my headphones, and to grab a Gu. I had forgotten my waffle and PB sandwich when I first got there and now it was too late to eat it (I had had one when I woke up 3 hours before), so I was glad I had the Gu.

Even before the race, I was wondering if I would not do the 10K and stop at the 5K. But I knew I had to decide before the race started so I knew what pace to run. The 10K it would be.

I passed the 5K finish around 32 minutes, so I would have had a course PR but not a 5K PR (which I wouldn't have been expecting), and I kept on going. Yes it was mentally tough, but I kept thinking it would just be another 32+ minutes.

I wasn't 100% sure what my PR was - I am pretty sure it was 1:13 for the Heartbreak Hill 10K and 1:09 for a flat 6.22 miles on the bike path during training. I ran yesterday in 1:07:29 so a PR definitely!

I felt great after the race!

Last night I spent time thinking about potential running goals even though I said I wouldn't have any. I thought about doing a 1/2 over Memorial Day weekend so back tracked to see when I would have to start training - I figured I could start at the end of March as long as I was consistently running 6-7 miles over the weekends - which would mean I would have to run additional for my 3-part race (Feb 22, March 1, March 8).

But I wasn't overly excited about the thought of training. Right now the race is $85 so I didn't sign up. I may sign up before it goes up, but may not be 100% committed to doing it.

And then waking up this morning and hobbling to the bathroom reminded me even more about why I may not/ should not train for another half. My foot usually hurts for a couple of days, which is part of which prevented me from running more times a week.

So right now I am not going to think about a 1/2 or even running more. I am going to do my own thing. I can't run with my running partner because she is training for a full in May, and I can't run a lot with the running group because they run Saturday mornings and Monday mornings and I need to go to WW on Saturdays and do my long runs on Sundays (and thus want to rest on Mondays).

So back to my true immediate goal: Get rid for the 5-7 lbs I have gained since the end of September.