Out of control and hating it

I jumped into the week with 2 feet thinking this was going to be a great week. Yeah, that was the case until Monday evening.

For the first time my daughter has practice on Monday night. My husband took her and I knew they wouldn't be home until 7ish like we were on Thursday. I picked up my son  and was home by 5:15. I had forgotten my 2nd cheesestick and was ravenous. And had 2 hours before dinner....so I ate myself out of house and home. Not complete junk - a small tub of tabbouleh and some pita chips and hummus, little bit of homemade salsa and chips....and a homemade muffin and a spoonful of Nutella. I think that was it. But I felt gross for doing it....and then 2 hours later I had a full dinner as well. Ouch my stomach hurt.

Why did I do this? Not 100% sure. I am so used to wanting to get dinner over with as soon as i get home - I had a hard time concentrating on anything else. My son wanted to play a video game so I let him. He didn't have any homework that needed to be done and I didn't have any quick house chores to be done because I do them all on the weekend. I didn't want to dive into an intense project because I would need to make dinner. So was it boredom? True hunger?

Tuesday started out well....I actually made my lunch - egg salad with 2 eggs and celery, in 2 flaxseed pitas. I thought I was going to have lunch with a co-worker. She usually IMs me around noon, but at that point she had been away from her desk for 10 minutes. She can be pretty inconsiderate sometimes and doesn't tell people when her plans have changed. So I figured she was out to lunch and I was starving so I ate my lunch. Then at 12:20 she asked to go to lunch. I could have gone downstairs and just chatted. But no - I had a second lunch, along with a 12 oz coke. Why the heck did I do that???!!!

My eating definitely has been thrown off by a lack of bananas for the morning, so I have been more ravenous than normal. I've been having a fruit cup when I normally have a banana, but that isn't helping at all.

But in good news, I got up this morning and worked out. I planned on doing 3 miles on the treadmill. I now know it is going to take some mental training to keep me on the dreadmill for 3-4 miles. I only last 1.5 miles before mentally I had to get off. My body could have kept going. I jumped on my bike trainer for 15 minutes. Baby steps......